When it comes to choosing a divorce lawyer, many people are surprised to learn just how different one family law attorney can be from another. Divorce lawyers don’t all operate the same way and the kind of lawyer you choose can have a significant impact on your divorce experience, cost, and outcome. Let’s examine the differences in divorce lawyers:
The Litigator Lawyers
At one end of the spectrum, you’ll find lawyers who are solely litigators. These are the courtroom warriors who are often referred to as “hard hat litigators”, who believe the best way to resolve a family dispute is in front of a judge. Some are open to settlement, but their core belief is that court provides the best resolution. This might be necessary in high-conflict cases, particularly where issues like domestic violence are present. These lawyers may also handle criminal defense work, especially when the two areas intersect.
The “Hybrid” Lawyers
Then, there are lawyers, who both litigate and engage in consensual dispute resolution processes like Mediation or Collaborative Divorce. These attorneys are capable of taking your case to court but are also committed to helping clients resolve their disputes by agreement when possible.
The Mediation and Collaborative Divorce Lawyers
On the opposite end from the litigators are the lawyers who no longer go to court at all. These attorneys focus entirely on Collaborative Divorce, Mediation, and cooperative or negotiated settlements. They’ve chosen to step away from litigation, not because they can’t litigate, but because they believe there’s a better way to resolve conflict.
Why I Become a Mediation and Collaborative Divorce Lawyer
After decades of litigation, I became disillusioned with what I saw as the wastefulness and gamesmanship of the litigation process. Time and again, I found myself engaged in strategic moves that didn’t serve my clients’ and their families but were simply part of legal maneuvering or gamesmanship. I experienced the frustrating ritual of document requests, refusals, meet-and-confer letters, and motions, often culminating in the other side handing over the documents at the last minute anyway. All this consumed time, energy, and, most importantly, my clients’ money.
I grew fatigued by needless, expensive conflict and by the distraction from what really mattered: helping families figure out what would work best for their future. That is when I shifted my practice toward Mediation and Collaborative Divorce, because they are processes designed to keep families out of court and focused on mutually agreed-upon solutions.
Carefully Choose the Right Lawyer for You
Choosing the right divorce lawyer ultimately depends on your situation and your goals. Understanding the differences between courtroom fighters and cooperative problem solvers can help you make a decision that supports not just your legal rights, but also your peace of mind and the long-term wellbeing of your family.
Lisa R. Murray is an experienced attorney in the Collaborative Divorce and Mediation Processes. She can help you determine your goals in a separation or a divorce.
Ms. Murray has been practicing family law since 1989 and is an owner of Chase, Bernstein & Murray Counselors at Law in Burlingame, CA. She has been recognized by Super Lawyers (https://www.superlawyers.com), an elite group of the top 5% of lawyers for 15 consecutive years.
She can be reached at 650-642-3897 or visit https://www.chaseberensteinandmurray.com